The Wine Pairing evenings at Lanser’s on Main all begin with a fun poem about wine. We search high and low for light hearted rhymes that will start the evening with a smile.

For our Warwick Wine Pairing in November 2022, we selected the following poem to kick things off….


Bjork stood upright in the dock
The judge looked up and frowned
The cuffs were firmly locked
As everyone stared him down

It wasn’t me he pleaded
I didn’t pull the ‘trigger’
Surely you can see it now
He was trying not to snigger

Was it not your cork that killed him?
The victim’s lawyer questioned?
Your initials are all over it
From one of your wine bottles, he mentioned

Indeed it was a cork of mine
From one of my wines, without a doubt
It wasn’t me who held it last
Before the crime was carried out

I confess it was my father
I know he doesn’t drink wine
His farts had become a bother
And his marriage was no longer fine

His wife told him to plug it
Which he did with trembling fear
To avoid a permanent split
With the love of his love; mother dear

It was the gas build up during the day
That caused this moment of dread
Poor old neighbour, David Mackay
Received a fatal cork-blow to the head

by Barrie Bramley